tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-68170975997041293902024-02-20T20:31:45.482-07:00Taking The Red Pillone man's journey to see how deep the rabbit hole really goesTommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.comBlogger38125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-21512830101948907662009-03-26T01:10:00.002-06:002009-03-26T01:15:41.436-06:00A Keeper?Sometimes I consider taking this blog down and just using my tej-blog.blospot.com one. That one seems to fulfill my needs just fine. I dont generally feel much motivation to post on my "gay blog." I feel pretty comfortable posting anything on the other blog even though it has a wider readership including family and straight/mormon friends, which this one doesnt.<br /><br />Plus I'm not sure that I like all my old posts on this blog anyways.<br /><br />Yeah I dunnoTommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-21442984778210207522009-03-20T02:12:00.002-06:002009-03-20T02:15:34.011-06:00Pro-libertyThe Mormons say they are pro-family, not anti-gay. Couldnt supporters of same-sex marriage say they are pro-liberty and not anti-mormon?Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-91035297710366062542009-03-07T15:08:00.003-07:002009-03-07T15:21:37.435-07:00ActivismI am in the library right now writing a sizable paper about Susan Glaspell's one-act play "Trifles." This play, published in 1915, has a heavy feminist message.<br /><br />One of the points I decided to make in my paper is that the real message of the play is one of female empowerment, and not simply female victimization. It is showing how women really do hold power, more than they-or anyone else-realizes.<br /><br />I think the gay community today could benefit from taking this stance in a more direct way. Instead of feeling so victimized by our society, by our families, by our religions, I think an effort should be made to do something a little different.<br /><br />We need to show people why homosexuals in society hold some sway. Why we are valuable, what we have to offer, how we can help lift those around us and continue onwards and upwards.<br /><br />It isn't that there isn't any of this going on now, for there is, or that all the rhetoric I hear is of people who (however justifiably so) are wounded by their situation in life, but I think our appeal to sentiment may be running out. Showing people our hurts and our wounds and appealing to sympathy and pity may have its place, certainly, in motivating some people to action. In the end though, I think we should try to motivate people to act not because of pity, but because they see the real, deep, true and intrinsic powers and contributions that homosexuals have to offer.<br /><br /><br />Just a thought. Hopefully that came out all right. I'm just brainstorming here and I have a paper to work on so I didn't even go back and re-read this :/Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-4162814063758039132009-02-01T23:17:00.002-07:002009-02-01T23:20:51.727-07:00Alias: TommySo I went to the Moho gathering at <a href="http://mormoninthecloset.blogspot.com/">Scott's</a> house on Saturday. It was rather funny because many fellow bloggers were there and when we were introduced many of them asked "What is your blogger alias?" and I answered "Uh, Tommy"<br /><br />I find the practice of fake alias's fascinating. (Though I understand why people choose to use them)Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-49959387054182165552009-01-10T15:00:00.001-07:002009-01-10T15:16:50.749-07:00Sir Ian McKellenDuring the Christmas break, I had quite a bit of glorious time in which I got to do whatever I felt like. Over the course of two days, I watched the Lord of the Rings trilogy (extended editions of course).<br /><br />I really love those movies (sometimes to the point that they become my drug), but I was thinking about something interesting during them.<br /><br />It was in middle school that I found of Sir Ian McKellen was gay. I probably just read about it online or something, but I was in such a strange mental state (you know—the whole shame/self hate phase *rolls eyes*) that I could hardly bring myself to even think about the films even back then. Every time I would think about the Lord of the Rings the homosexuality of Gandalf’s actor would inevitably pop into my head. It thoroughly ruined the movies. I told my best friend about it too one day and he was incredibly angry at me for telling him because it had the same effect on him (hmm…).<br /><br />Of course, I got over it after a couple of months and could put that aside and once again enjoy the pleasure that LOTR is for me.<br /><br /><br />This is the first time I have watched the movies in a while and I was surprised by how different things were for me. I had largely forgotten about the phase I had gone through before when I learned of Ian McKellen’s homosexuality.<br /><br />As I watched, I was really impressed by Ian’s ability as an actor. Just as it shouldn’t, his sexual orientation doesn’t matter to me at all any more and wasn’t a factor in my judgments of him.<br /><br />So I now have this overwhelming respect for the man and how good of a job I think he did in the movies. In fact, I have to admit that I find his prowess as an actor and other life accomplishments and integrity as a person to be very attractive (in a platonic sort of way of course).<br /><br />The point is Sir Ian McKellen is super cool and I’m shocked and ashamed (in a way) to remember the paradigms of life I held in middle school. Though I don’t suppose I can hold it against myself too much.Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-10850786512097462822009-01-07T16:32:00.001-07:002009-01-07T16:33:39.292-07:00Gay ScripturesAccording to Spencer Kimball, these scriptures all prove homosexuality wrong, or can be applied to the issue at least.<br /><br /><br />leviticus 20:13,15; romans 1:26-28; matthew 19:12; ezekiel 18:21-23; 2 nephi 33:3-5; moses 4:4; d&c 1:31-32; 2 nephi 9:31-34; 2 peter 2:17; revelation 20:12; 2 nephi 15:19-21; 2 nephi 20:33; acts 5:3-4; psalm 107:17; deuteronomy 23:17; matthew 18:8-9; 1 nephi 3:7; 2 nephi 9:40; d&c 58:42-43; matthew 11:28-30; moroni 7:12-14; jeremiah 2:13; d&c 62:3; 2 nephi 15:15; job 38; genesis 4; abraham 5:18; d&c 104:5-6; 1 corinthians 6:9; john 8:11; 2 nephi 9:40; alma 12:34; revelation 3:20-21; d&c 1:33; 2 nephi 9:38-39; 2 nephi 27:3; ezekiel 8:12; 2 nephi 20:15; alma 5:17-21; d&c 132:52; d&c 42:22; revelation 3:4-5; revelation 7:13-15; alma 3:27; 2 nephi 9:20-28; 2 nephi 10:23; mosiah 16:11-12; alma 3:26-27; d&c 19:15-18; james 1:13-15; alma 41:5-10; matthew 12:30; d&c 18:6; revelation 2:17; revelation 3:17-19; 2 nephi 20:3; 2 nephi 9:29; 2 nephi 2:27; ether 2:15; 2 nephi 20:27; psalm 1:7; 1 corinthians 7:23; d&c 18:11; helaman 13:38; revelation 3:12; jeremiah 50:6; 2 nephi 26:22; 2 nephi 9:31-38,40; mosiah 26:35-36; moroni 9:4Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-24132270638982540282008-12-29T21:52:00.002-07:002008-12-29T21:56:09.477-07:00Secondary BlogI just wanted to let you all know about my 2nd blog which can be found at: tej-blog.blogspot.com<br /><br />I am going to have that blog be one that is not pointed or anything. Just a Tommy blog where I talk about whatever and can post the link on Facebook and send it to family so they can keep up with me and whatnot. I will still post on this one about things I don't want everyone I know to be able to read.<br /><br />So I am not going anywhere, just expanding my blogging horizons.<br /><br /><br /><br />TommyTommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-61531130517936130982008-12-19T02:03:00.002-07:002008-12-19T02:14:26.032-07:00Dreaming...In January, I will have been having this recurring dream for about a year now. It goes like this:<br /><br />I am at some venue in my hometown. It is sometimes a restaurant, other times a furniture store, sometimes it is in someone's home, but it has always been in a different location.<br /><br />I am with a girl who I am at least somewhat attracted to (I guess). It is always a different girl.<br /><br />The details of what exactly is going on are fairly fuzzy (nothing specific happens), but I know that we are always laying down and there are sexual undertones to the situation (thought everyone remains fully clothed throughout the dream). It isn't outwardly explicit but certainly there is an element of eroticism.<br /><br />In the dream, my sentiments toward what is going on are a little apathetic. It is kind of nice, I guess, but nothing special or amazing.<br /><br />Then suddenly a guy walks in. Again, it is always a different guy. My attention turns toward him, and the girl fades away. I am filled with incredible sensations, my veins are like fire and my stomach is full of butterflies. I feel a sense of comfort and relief. It feels good. It feels right.<br /><br />And then the dream ends.Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-79360967235188980622008-11-12T11:36:00.003-07:002008-11-12T14:27:33.251-07:00Updates and a Reply<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Well, it's all pretty much finalized in my mind. I will apply to begin at the University of Washington beginning in March, and my time left in Utah grows short. It was a tough and very multi-faceted decision. In the end I guess the final straw was realizing that attending a university that brings conditions into my life that make me feel like killing myself is not worth it no matter what. So I am getting out.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Also, I haven't been posting much, so I figured I would let you all in on an email I recieved from my aunt the other week. The circumstances were brought about by facebook and a group I joined but then promptly left. She saw it and was offending which resulted in:</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><blockquote>Dear Tommy,<br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> 27 October 2008</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> I'm worried about you. I figured all of the stress and hype about proposition 8 might be unpleasant for you, and I've tried to keep in touch to make sure that you were handling it okay.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> When your post on email said that you had joined the Nazis for CA's Prop.8, I checked it out. Like so many other No on 8 places, it seemed to be lacking in tolerance, at least.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> I understand that you were being facetious and that you probably weren't trying to hurt my feelings, or anyone else's.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> My concern is with the intensity of some of your comments. We've discussed the importance in your situation, in everyone's situation, of following the Spirit in our lives. An earmark of someone who is filled with the Spirit is the abundance of genuine love for other people. You expressed that to me in a phone call a while ago.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> Since then it seems like your life has taken a terrible turn for the worse. Honestly, I don't think someone who is filled with the Spirit would choose to associate himself with such a hateful post. It is a manifestation of the harsh turmoil and confusion that seems to surround you these days.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> I am concerned that, instead of trying to align yourself with the Lord's will for you and His plan for your life, you are trying to make Him (and His Church) bend to your will or be ridiculed for not doing so. This is a clear earmark of pride, and, pride, if allowed to remain unchecked, always leads to unhappiness.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> I really want you to have a satisfying, happy life. I know that you have had a testimony of the gospel. I know that your spirit is strong enough and has been close enough to the Lord that you will never be content with partial closeness to the Lord, or to His Spirit.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> As one who loves you, I beg you to humbly pray to Heavenly Father, with a willingness to follow His will no matter how hard it is, until you are again filled with love and peace. I know that this is the only path to happiness in this life and the next.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> I have no desire to hurt or offend you. If I have misspoken or given any offense, I hope you can temper it with the understanding that no matter what you do, there will always be a unique place in my heart for only you, and that that place is filled with love and affection.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> Sincerely and with love"</span></blockquote></span><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">To which I (eventually) replied:</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><blockquote>Hi! Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you. I planned on waiting a week before replying, but with me spending 10+ hours every day on campus alone it has dragged beyond that.<br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Also, I have written about 3 different drafts of this email (all of which were fairly long and were brilliant writings...), but in the end I think it best to keep it short.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">I understand your concerns and appreciate your concern. I have a quite a few thoughts in response, but will only share these: Firstly, if you are trying to track/determine the condition of another's soul and character, Facebook is </span><i style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">not</i><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> the best source for that. I might equate it with getting news from the tabloids. Secondly, I knew how I would be received from the beginning. I knew emails like this would come, and that this is how I would be viewed. I am actually suprised at how long it has taken for that to occur. (Although intellectual preperation doesn't make the misunderstanding any more easy to deal with when it comes.) In the first few months of this year I realized that my own self respect and dignity are perhaps two of the best gifts I can give the world, and I reject the notion that I owe </span><i style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">one</i><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> person an apology/explanation for my choices.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Just know that I have left no stone unturned and I have extensively, deeply, methodically, and prayerfully considered every aspect of this issue. I am fully aware of the potential repurcussions on all sides and of every choice. You might think this naive of me, and while I dont know and cannot predict what the future holds, I know what my heart holds and am prepared for all that I will face. Of course I will make mistakes along the way, but that is just the human condition and I apologize if one of these mistakes has offended you or hurt your feelings.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Additionally, the Lord (and the Lord alone) understands my heart and if I were to face him today, I would not be embarassed. He knows and understands. Just realize that as you are indeed on "the outside looking in," there is so much that you cannot understand, and therefore I accept your views and will take the heat.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">With deepest love,</span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Tommy</span></blockquote></span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-78925869626760609452008-11-07T17:23:00.002-07:002008-11-07T17:26:14.007-07:00Pros and Cons<span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Yes, yes I did. I actually made a pro and con list, and perhaps for the first time. Here are the ups and downs of transferring to the University of Washington. I might add more as I think of them.</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Transferring to UW, Pros and Cons</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;">Pro</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would be free from Big Brother (the Honor Code) constantly breathing down my neck.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would be in Seattle. I LOVE Seattle…</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would be able to be truly open and authentic.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would be reunited with many of my best friends.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would be close to my hometown and family.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I love the energy/vibes the Northwest seems to have.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I have a lot more fun with my Washingtonian friends… not that I don’t like my friends here, but somehow its different</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would be free from mandated religion and would be able to choose the role the Church plays in my life.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would have a circle of straight friends, which I long for. At BYU its hard to find straight people I can truly be open around without risking honor code discipline.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• Because of that, I can only be open in gay circles, and therefore I spend most of my time with gay people and all they seem to be able to talk about is being gay which is annoying.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• The gay circle I hang out with now will all graduate at least 3 semesters before me, if not more, so I would have to find all new friends</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;">Con</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• My roots are already set in Provo. My systems are up. I am settled in.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I have just finished breaking all the way into a social circle and would have to do it all over.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I wouldn’t have as strong of a gay mormon support group.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• Potentially lesser chances of a finding a decent guy.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I wouldn’t be able to do as much to promote understanding and build bridges between the gay and straight worlds. I could make more of a difference here.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would miss all the wonderful friends I have made.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I like the academics at BYU.</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• BYU is so inexpensive!</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• I would have to figure out how to get all my stuff back from provo to seattle</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• Would I just be running from my problems? Or is it that BYU is the source of my problems?</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">• Would I still be forced to think and analyze my personal life and truly figure things out? In an environment like BYU, one has to know exactly what they believe and why they believe that.</span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-9820752776485834822008-10-28T23:29:00.002-06:002008-10-28T23:39:21.078-06:00A Momentous Decision<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">I have been thinking about something a lot lately and I think I have made my decision about it now.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Bittersweetly, my tenure at BYU is coming to a close and this will be my last semester. I am going to transfer to the University of Washington in Seattle.</span><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/_7LYnt2Lmf5M/R-W6GevBrFI/AAAAAAAAA0E/jcktC5S0wsY/IMG_0080.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 249px; height: 165px;" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/_7LYnt2Lmf5M/R-W6GevBrFI/AAAAAAAAA0E/jcktC5S0wsY/IMG_0080.JPG" alt="" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">I feel very good about this choice. Immediately after realizing this is what I want to do, I felt a large weight lifted from my shoulders. I suppose I still might decide to finish out Winter semester here at BYU, but I think the sooner I transfer the easier it will be. Having 4 full semesters before transferring begins to make it difficult.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">But I truly do feel good about this and am looking forward to heading back to my homeland. It's time.</span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-64346823264356305202008-10-14T15:51:00.004-06:002008-10-14T15:57:07.392-06:00Lies Surrounding Prop 8 and Arguments Against it (from my Facebook)<span style="font-family: georgia;">I originally wrote this as a note that I posted on Facebook, but it has been forever since I have posted on here, so I'm putting it up here also. Although most of my blog readers are also on Facebook and have probably already seen it.</span><br /><br /><a style="font-family: georgia;" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAwHqpegJ_COqtFSbCV5mM6gpS9YOHTbZrsfymHWEXIkK0FNepv0VbXiWS6LL-5Kvm0QbqsKYGmR1wuZ8mMKUg53sdgECMHomj4AefVloutl_yIjk4Sz7XsrS7AoimevhY8XNBue08Dzth/s1600-h/cuore.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAwHqpegJ_COqtFSbCV5mM6gpS9YOHTbZrsfymHWEXIkK0FNepv0VbXiWS6LL-5Kvm0QbqsKYGmR1wuZ8mMKUg53sdgECMHomj4AefVloutl_yIjk4Sz7XsrS7AoimevhY8XNBue08Dzth/s320/cuore.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5257131064511112866" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">After reading the responses to my last note, I have realized how much complete misinformation about Prop 8 is being spread.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">It is true that California does have the most extensive system of domestic partnerships and Prop 8 does not </span><i style="font-family: georgia;">legally</i><span style="font-family: georgia;"> change very much for same sex couples. Regardless, there are still many myths being circulated among volunteers that are not only unfounded and untrue (it takes very little research to put each of these myths to rest), but are a form of scare tactics, which are sadly working quite well. It is a sad day when the "Yes on 8" people resort to lies and the spreading of fear as a sort of last stand against gay marriages. I have heard some people even citing General Authorities as believing in some of these myths, which just about makes me want to vomit.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">No matter what happens in November, there will be large groups of people who are upset and/or hurt. The 1st and 14th Amendments are in a very, very precarious dance and even the slightest change could tip the scales. Certainly religion will not go completely unaffected if gay marriage is allowed to continue, but I seriously doubt it will be a drastic change for the worse.</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">Lets begin by looking at a few of the untruths, and then I will link you to sources that more fully discuss the issues, which you should look at if you are planning on voting in good conscious in November.</span><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Myth</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">Churches may be sued over their tax-exempt status if they refuse to allow same-sex marriage ceremonies in their buildings.</span><br /><blockquote style="font-family: georgia;">This is <i>theoretically</i> and potentially possible, but will almost certainly not occur. In order to do this, the IRS would have to prove that the LDS Church's stance is not in harmony with public interest and is completely at odds with the community conscience, so far so that any benefit that the Church provides to society is completely undermined. It is extremely unlikely that the IRS would take or succeed in such an action.<br />Additionally, the Church is not forced to marry same-sex couples in Massachusetts, where gay marriage has been legal for some time now. The Church is not forced to allow, say, Jehovah's Witnesses to marry in our temples. The temples aren't open to the public to begin with. No, legalizing gay marriage will not result in the Church's loss of tax breaks.</blockquote><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Myth</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">Churches will be forced to marry same sex couples even if they don't want to.</span><br /><blockquote style="font-family: georgia;">This is taken directly from page of 117 the Court’s decision. <i>"Finally, affording same-sex couples the opportunity to obtain the designation of marriage will not impinge upon the religious freedom of any religious organization, official, or any other person; no religion will be required to change its religious policies or practices with regard to same-sex couples, and no religious officiant will be required to solemnize a marriage in contravention of his or her religious beliefs." </i><br />Well, there goes that myth.</blockquote><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Myth</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">But if we legalize gay marriage, next polygamy will have to be legal! Then people will want to marry animals next!</span><br /><blockquote style="font-family: georgia;">This is a prime example of the fallacy of the slippery slope. Also, Mormons should be the very last group to make this argument. Who wants to marry an animal anyways? Could the animal sign the wedding certificate? Need I go on?</blockquote><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Myth</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">Children in public schools will have to be taught that same-sex marriage is just as good as traditional marriage.</span><br /><blockquote style="font-family: georgia;"> Regarding curriculum in California, the law states:<br /><ul><br /><li>Instruction and materials shall teach respect for marriage and committed relationships.<br /></li><li>Instruction and materials shall be appropriate for use with pupils of all races, genders, sexual orientations, ethnic and cultural backgrounds, and pupils with disabilities.<br /></li><li>Instruction and materials shall be age appropriate.<br /></li><li>All factual information presented shall be medically accurate and objective.<br /></li><li>Instruction and materials shall encourage a pupil to communicate with his or her parents or guardians about human sexuality.<br /></li></ul><br />There is little evidence any of this will change regardless of the outcome of the vote. Teaching respect for marriage and committed relationships, and teaching about the responsibilities of marriage and parenthood are good lessons for students regardless of sexual orientation.<br />Plus, God forbid a homosexual child might grow up thinking his/her future relationships might be legitimate. God forbid a young homosexual child might grow up without all the pain and self-loathing that comes with being gay. A gay child allowed to be open and authentic from the beginning? Unthinkable! God forbid that the next generation of children will not grow up being prejudiced towards homosexuals.</blockquote><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Argument</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">In their letter to the members of California in June, the First Presidency said, </span><i style="font-family: georgia;">"In March 2000 California voters overwhelmingly approved a state law providing the 'Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.' The California Supreme Court recently reversed this vote of the people."</i><span style="font-family: georgia;"> This seems to imply large distaste for the Courts. May I point out that perhaps it is part of the duty of the courts to overrule the people when the actions they are taking and voting for are discriminatory?</span><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Argument</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">During one of the lectures in my LDS Marriage and Family class, we learned that 100% of marriages not performed in the Temple end in divorce (upon death, the pair is no longer bound). While I don't believe that,it is the line of Mormon thought. Continuing down that path, it would seem to mean that a heterosexual marriage and a homosexual marriage not performed in the temple would have equal eternal worth: none. So after you pass Prop 8, please try to legislate it so that no one who is not LDS can marry at all, since it doesn't matter anyways. (Note my facetiousness.)</span><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Argument</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">We must ‘preserve the traditional marriage and family’ and ‘children deserve to grow up with traditional parents.”</span><br /><blockquote style="font-family: georgia;">First of all, the notion of a “traditional family” is a bit of an illusion. What tradition? Where? Early 19th century traditional marriages when married women had no legal standing, could not own property, sign contracts, or legally control any earned wages? ‘Traditional’ LDS marriages involving more than one bride? Did you know that even today there are more polygamous societies than monogamous? The purposes of marriage vary greatly over cultures and short periods of time.<br />If I, as a single gay man were to adopt children, no one would have any beef with it. But add another man to the mix and suddenly everything is changed. Is it better that a child spends their entire life in the adoption system, never receiving a family or the love they deserve than with a gay couple? Heterosexuals often have children by accident. Homosexuals have a history of having to fight very hard in order to become parents. If a gay couple is looking to adopt, one can be assured they really want it. I think homosexuals make absolutely fabulous parents!</blockquote><br /><br /><b style="font-family: georgia;">Argument</b><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">“God has made his position on homosexuality and homosexual relationships/marriages very clear.” </span><br /><blockquote style="font-family: georgia;">Where? The Book of Mormon? The words of Christ? The Church leaders surely have a stance, however that stance and their procedures of dealing with homosexuals has changed <i>dramatically</i> over the past 30 or 40 years. Who is to say it will not continue to change? Do I need to pull out the quotes of Church leaders regarding blacks and the Priesthood? The LDS Church evolves rapidly.<br />For me, it all comes down to personal revelation. After immense soul searching God told me quite differently. I had to fight for every ounce of revelation I have gotten, and it was a long and arduous road (and one that I am still on). It is not a path for the faint of heart. Though all this, I have been able to come to no conclusion other than 1: personal revelation trumps the blanket advice of the Bretheren and 2: God endorses my homosexuality and perusal of a relationship in the status thereof. If there is anything I have spiritual confirmation of in the whole world, it is this. While I will never deny the spiritual experiences of others, neither will I allow them to deny mine.</blockquote><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">One more thing on a more personal note. In response to my last note, a friend wrote me regarding their support of me entering a domestic partnership and being happy, but at the same time expressing their devotion to marriage as being divinely instituted to be between a man and a woman. In response, I said: "...one day if I ever have a life partner, what you said in your message implicitly states that my relationship with him is not as important nor as valid as your relationship with your spouse is. And that is what hurts the most about it." It is true, and is a point I have yet to hear anyone successfully argue against. They all express their love for me and at the same time reinforce those notions and deny us respect and dignity.</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">The sky will not and has not fallen with the ushering in of gay marriage.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: georgia;">PS (Congratulations to Connecticut)</span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-9815871910289729862008-08-27T20:19:00.004-06:002008-08-27T21:26:40.862-06:00Flip Flop<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">I wanted to say a little about my feelings about the Church. If you can't tell from some of my previous posts, I go back and forth a lot. </span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Some days, I am terribly bitter. I get upset at the institution of the Church and its leaders. I feel like I never want to step into another chapel again.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Other days, I am intensely nostalgic. I desperately miss the Church and all that it was to me during high school. It makes me really sad that this is how things have to be.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Oftentimes, I will compose a blog entry, but not post it. The next day I go back to read it and I don't feel the same way anymore, so I don't end up posting it. I suppose one day my flip-flopiness will balance out to a pleasant equilibrium, or at least that is what I hope will happen.<br /><br /><br /><br />And this video is fantastic. Beautiful and profound.<br /></span><br /><object height="344" width="425"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/sgzC_R9kkHI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-45342182850005583222008-08-17T07:54:00.002-06:002008-08-17T08:24:45.866-06:00Out and About<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102); font-family: trebuchet ms;">I officially came out to my first friend on January 29, 2008.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102); font-family: trebuchet ms;">As of August 15, 2008, I officially have no one left on my list to come out to. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102); font-family: trebuchet ms;">I am now completely out to everyone in my life. It feels strange; it feels surreal. I never would have thought that I would ever get to the point I am at. Throughout my adolescence my homosexuality seemed as if it was going to be something that I kept to myself my entire life. At best, I only thought a few people would ever know. Now everyone knows, and I couldn't go back even if I wanted to.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102); font-family: trebuchet ms;">A part of me still feels vulnerable, but above all, I feel great. I don't have to hide anything from anyone anymore. I can be who I want to be and do what I want to do without worrying about other people. A lot of people don't necessarily agree with my plans for the future, but they still trust and love me and aren't going to let that get in the way of our relationship.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102); font-family: trebuchet ms;">I feel so free and so open and so much better than I had expected.</span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-47645363232848872802008-08-11T21:31:00.005-06:002008-08-13T16:27:13.065-06:00MormenLikeMeHere I am! The first one and the last one are especially good.<br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/s7atkh1zCT4&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/s7atkh1zCT4&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/qcNyCi-nLTU&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/qcNyCi-nLTU&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/QnWb2pap57k&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/QnWb2pap57k&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/75Ttp5rbcL4&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/75Ttp5rbcL4&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/2lgOTNeV3GI&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/2lgOTNeV3GI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/6MRHsBs9IVw&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/6MRHsBs9IVw&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wxpJA_HwEm0&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wxpJA_HwEm0&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/IEVyjHuCs7U&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/IEVyjHuCs7U&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/U0q8G3OBzCI&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/U0q8G3OBzCI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /></object></object>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-26895817362335483852008-08-04T23:01:00.001-06:002008-08-04T23:03:25.611-06:00Completion<span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" ><a style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlbIkJY-vM60AY_X2xelLJaTBvomPewYoPRNHlkxoFOpZLMea1-_qyK4CJKPrQdCPa5IKUnFlZ51f2qaG-OIY6pVMYvLj4Vi8vZwnNeXbCSUTlUEYFY_A1YEPvdaow1idZOU-5vnAYXbKo/s1600-h/P1020530.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 346px; height: 461px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlbIkJY-vM60AY_X2xelLJaTBvomPewYoPRNHlkxoFOpZLMea1-_qyK4CJKPrQdCPa5IKUnFlZ51f2qaG-OIY6pVMYvLj4Vi8vZwnNeXbCSUTlUEYFY_A1YEPvdaow1idZOU-5vnAYXbKo/s400/P1020530.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5230894448900444450" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><span style="font-size:180%;"><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">I was so happy I cried.</span></span><br /></span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-59253519202528060672008-08-02T23:46:00.007-06:002008-08-03T10:39:30.986-06:00Censorship and AuthenticityI do not believe in censorship.<br /><br />I do not believe in hiding who you are.<br /><br />It is no way to live.<br /><br />Therefore, I am now done with every aspect of the facade.<br /><br />Every tiny aspect.<br /><br />Totally, completely, one hundred percent.<br /><br />Done.<br /><br /><br /><br />My name is <span style="font-style: italic;">not </span>neo.<br /><br />My name is Thomas Edward Johnson.<br /><br />I go by Tommy.<br /><br />I was born on July 25, 1989, at 4:23 PM in American Fork, Utah.<br /><br />I am gay.<br /><br />I love who I am.<br /><br />I would not change it for anything.<br /><br />I attend BYU.<br /><br />The link to my facebook: http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1576410040<br /><br />This is what I look like.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_VMecvWhDB8ODXNf_PmlyqBq2ujshqzW8xTFYZITStGLV5QTqVT_BF0PbnBcoW4N1_nMNwMggmyKioeHlM1-0GQbg3v7OYRLGIBW6zz7narav2vnCOANDDUXd52FImdK5jUZiFcC9Wp1J/s1600-h/n688601093_582381_6267.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_VMecvWhDB8ODXNf_PmlyqBq2ujshqzW8xTFYZITStGLV5QTqVT_BF0PbnBcoW4N1_nMNwMggmyKioeHlM1-0GQbg3v7OYRLGIBW6zz7narav2vnCOANDDUXd52FImdK5jUZiFcC9Wp1J/s400/n688601093_582381_6267.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5230167646893807506" border="0" /></a><br /><br />My social security number is... just kidding.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I make a pledge, right here right now, to never delete this post.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Now, come what may.<br /><br /><br /><br />Truth always wins out.Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-55617507924493375142008-07-23T17:56:00.005-06:002008-07-25T05:51:35.408-06:00I <3 Rain!<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">I had a sudden urge to be productive and write. At first, I couldn’t figure out why. Then I realized it was because it started raining outside, and rain really puts me in my groove. Oh I am such a product of Seattle.</span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><br /><br />In other news, the 7 year old girl I nanny for called me out today for wearing a girl’s shirt. In my defense, I bought it without realizing it was a girl’s shirt; it was super cheap so I just grabbed it. The design on it is gender neutral, but the fit is definitely more feminine; the neck is a little wider, the sleeves shorter, and very fitted. However, I do not say so apologetically. I am by no means opposed to wearing women’s shirts. I often browse the women’s department for clothes that I could pull off (especially the jeans). The only </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >shirt</span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> I have bought consciously knowing it was a girl’s shirt was this one:</span><br /><br /><a style="font-family: trebuchet ms;" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJHy96rUqTer6PTGlXr7tGqQ7AZZa1NmcYPWph7XCfVqL1ko9YEzWP9S5HKsJ0cOL-wRpD9HJLq9zcB838deU3yklQJn7rV8lOs46LyhjvAAwrx8dPNqaQ4axPXCvuaayXGkZfvAEScpSi/s1600-h/life+liberty+boys.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJHy96rUqTer6PTGlXr7tGqQ7AZZa1NmcYPWph7XCfVqL1ko9YEzWP9S5HKsJ0cOL-wRpD9HJLq9zcB838deU3yklQJn7rV8lOs46LyhjvAAwrx8dPNqaQ4axPXCvuaayXGkZfvAEScpSi/s320/life+liberty+boys.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5226363051169607346" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">What can I say? It was on clearance and I needed something to wear to Pride… ;-)</span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><br /><br /><br />Speaking of jeans, I have a funny progression in my jean sizes to describe.</span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">In 10th grade, I used to buy size 32x32. Then I realized I was a 32x30. I had one pair of 31x30 but didn’t like them. In 12th grade, I bought two pairs of Levi’s size 30x30. That was a big step for me. One was the Slim Straight fit and I didn’t wear them for a long time because I was embarrassed that they were too tight and I felt emo. My freshman year of college they became my favorite jeans. Now, I wear those jeans when I want to wear something a little looser and more airy. The jeans I buy now are slim fitted 28x30’s. (and its not because I am skinnier) That is about as small as i can wear. Also, I regularly try on girl pants but haven’t found any I really like yet (I think I wear a size 6 though). When I do though, I will not hesitate nor be embarrassed to buy them.</span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><br /><br /><br />The housekeeper came earlier this week and I realized that I was totally outed to her as she tidied my bathroom and room.<br /><br /></span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Incriminating Evidence:<br /><br /></span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Room:</span><br /><ul><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">The rainbow “embrace diversity” banner on the dresser</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Three kinds of pink lip gloss (roll on, brush on, squeeze on) on the dest</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A copy of The Advocate on the dresser</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A flyer for a dance party coming up with Queer written in big bold letters across it on the nightstand</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">8 pairs of shoes on the floor</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">My knitting on the bed</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Clothes in closet organized according to color</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">etc.<br /></span></li></ul><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Bathroom:</span><br /><ul><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Medicine cabinet full of hair and face products such as:</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Apricot Mango Radiance Shave Gel<br /></span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Herbal Essences hair spray (Cactus Flower and Bamboo scented…. Mmm)</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Rose Hip scented Herbal Essences Shampoo & Conditioner (my ALL TIME favorite)</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Garnier Fructis Molding Wax<br /></span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Well-used tweezers</span></li><li><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">etc.<br /></span></li></ul><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Very gay.</span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-38372403959953783212008-07-13T20:03:00.003-06:002008-07-27T11:49:29.502-06:00Bits and Pieces.<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I don't feel like composing a whole post. So here are a bunch of random thoughts.<br /><br /><br /><br />I sprained my left oblique abdominal muscle last week coughing. It really hurts.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I went to the Burlington, Vermont Pride Fest (Cirque du So Gay) recently and I LOVED it.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I am so over and done with the LDS Church.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Everyone has me feeling like I am marching off to my doom by returning to BYU, and they might be correct.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I have made a lot of friends out here in NY/VT but they all live an hour drive and a $20 ferry ticket away.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I love earl gray tea and decaf soy lattes.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I really love hazelnut espresso milkshakes. mmmm</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I feel happy and satisfied with life but still feel I am in need of a good session of bawl-my-eyes out catharsis.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >My favorite song of all time is Into The West, as sung by Annie Lennox.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I understand that many gay and lds people are very conflicted and are in great pain, but I don't want to be around their depression anymore.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I feel like taking a break from blogging.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I miss my friends from high school and college and church and elsewhere who are now spread across the country.<br /><br />I've never been in a relationship before. I want to.<br /><br />I've never tasted alcohol. I don't want to.<br /><br />Two days after the consumption of caffeine, I get a migraine.<br /><br />I still have issues being able to express my feelings to anyone. Damn closet.<br /></span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-82518548046446246792008-06-30T12:59:00.004-06:002008-06-30T16:31:19.515-06:00Still Just Me<span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;font-size:100%;" ><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">A wave of gratitude just hit me so I'm posting about it.</span><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">I came out in March and:</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">To my parents, I am still just their son. Not their gay son.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">To my siblings, I am their still just brother. Not their gay brother.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">To my aunts and uncles, I am still just their nephew. Not their gay nephew.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">The same goes for my friends. Although we have a lot of fun with the gay thing.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">And that is awesome.</span><br /></span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-18981792347892083422008-06-27T20:09:00.003-06:002008-06-27T20:51:00.888-06:00Blacks and Gays<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">In one of my political science classes at BYU last fall, we had a guest speaker come and talk about civil rights. Incidentally, he was the first black man to go through the temple after the ban was lifted.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">During question and answer time, someone raised their hand and asked what he thought about people drawing parallels between the civil rights movement and the gay rights movement. The guest speaker thought that the notion was highly offensive and asked if gays were sprayed with firehoses and segregated etc..</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">I suppose he is right in a way, but I still must disagree.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">The volume of incidents against blacks is indeed much greater and more extreme. The history of the civil rights movement is a violent one. And though we cannot go so far as to say that the two are exactly alike, neither can we say that they are incomparable.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">I think it all comes down to the closet. According the 2000 US Census, 12.3% of American citizens are African American. And although estimates range from an extreme low of 2% to an extreme high of 10-15%, I'd say between 6 and 8% of the population are gay. If there was some undeniable, unmistakable and unavoidable biological marker of homosexuality, I think that the similarities between the two groups would be much greater. If one could tell that someone was gay from a mile away, it is probable that the number of gay hate crimes would be much, much higher. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">One cannot conceal being black. One can conceal being gay. If it weren't for this, I do not think it implausible to think that the history of homosexuality would be inordinately different and much more violent.</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">And now, a little relevant satire.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33334</span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-23548669756908287032008-06-24T06:22:00.004-06:002008-06-24T09:29:28.556-06:00Disappointing Yet Expected<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >On Sunday, June 29, 2008, a letter regarding the recent decision of the California Supreme Court will be read from the pulpit in all Wards and Branches of that state. The letter has been confirmed by the Church Spokesman as authentic. This is the letter in full.<br /><br /></span><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.fscottassoc.com/lds-exterior1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 247px; height: 185px;" src="http://www.fscottassoc.com/lds-exterior1.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102); font-style: italic;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Dear Brethren and Sisters,</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >In March 2000 California voters overwhelmingly approved a state law providing the "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California." The California Supreme Court recently reversed this vote of the people. On November 4, 2008, Californians will vote on a proposed amendment to the California state constitution that will now restore the March 2000 definition of marriage approved by the voters.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >The Church's teachings and position on this moral issue are unequivocal. Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God, and the formation of families is central to the Creator's plan for His children. Children are entitled to be born within this bond of marriage.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >A broad-based coalition of churches and other organizations placed the proposed amendment on the ballot. The Church will participate with this coalition in seeking its passage. Local Church leaders will provide information about how you may become involved in this important cause.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >We ask that you do all you can to support the proposed constitutional amendment by donating of your means and time to assure that marriage in California is legally defined as being between a man and a woman. Our best efforts are required to preserve the sacred institution of marriage.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Sincerely Yours,</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Thomas S. Monson</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Henry B. Eyring</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Dieter F. Uchtdorf</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >The First Presidency</span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-87520285899061622562008-06-21T19:38:00.004-06:002008-06-21T19:47:51.335-06:00Pre-Existence<div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Somehow I doubt it works like this, but still.</span><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEsoX82YHmf3AreENRHJnktsCxrZrokSMWdpw-_QQrD3zxNJYKbzueRcuNCXeh3JsD10AAE2IaB2fN-uNXTyjOaZE8lsp9lXu0v8hLbzOL62ReSoekVA1X4ogRX-dK4pdELw7UI6ILuz9J/s1600-h/Picture+1.png"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 425px; height: 303px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEsoX82YHmf3AreENRHJnktsCxrZrokSMWdpw-_QQrD3zxNJYKbzueRcuNCXeh3JsD10AAE2IaB2fN-uNXTyjOaZE8lsp9lXu0v8hLbzOL62ReSoekVA1X4ogRX-dK4pdELw7UI6ILuz9J/s400/Picture+1.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5214516427518387762" border="0" /></a><br /></div>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-76969536243346849442008-06-20T14:18:00.003-06:002008-06-20T14:28:50.412-06:00Going Back. Rolling Forward.<div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Some people have asked me, “Why are you going back to that hell hole [meaning BYU] in Fall?”</span> <br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://saas.byu.edu/admissionsServices/schoolRelations/global_images/images_for_content_area/horizontal_images/campusevening.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px;" src="http://saas.byu.edu/admissionsServices/schoolRelations/global_images/images_for_content_area/horizontal_images/campusevening.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >To start, I didn’t hate BYU. It was tough being</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" > there,</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" > </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >but I didn’t hate it</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >. </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I loved my classes. I</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" > liked campus. I liked the people in my Ward. I liked my Bishop. I enjoyed my friends and roommates. It was inexpensive. I was just going through an intense spiritual journey that didn’t mesh with Mormon doctrine very well, which is where things got interesting for me.</span> <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" ><br /></span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I wont hesitate to tell you that my time at BYU was difficult and probably the most painful 8 or 9 months of my life, but </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >I don’t lay all of the blame on the school for that. I don’t think of my time there as time spent in a “hell hole.” There were things that I needed to go through as part of my life’s spiritual journey that were inherently painful, and just because I happened to be at the location of BYU doesn’t mean that its is totally BYU’s fault.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >That being said, BYU did play a big part in inciting all of the inner turmoil I was in. I was in the throes of re-evaluating my true-believing-Mormon paradigm. I had reached a point in my life where I no longer could continue to just trust every word that came out of the mouths of the Brethren. I was exploring the intricacies of doubt and paradox and faith. I was finding out what rang true for me spiritually and what did not, what I was comfortable with and what I could not allow myself to believe. I was attempting to throw out the bathwater but keep the baby. Apart from re-thinking my faith, I was simultaneously coming to an acceptance of my own homosexuality.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Having a parting of ways with one’s religion and coming to term with one’s homosexuality is a lot for one plate to handle, but I think it was vital for my journey.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Being at BYU and in that ultra-Mormon environment forced me to do several things. At a secular school, I could have believed and done anything that I wanted, and no one would have cared either way. I would have had no pressure to do any one thing.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >At a religious school (especially BYU), it did matter a whole lot what I thought and what I believed and what I did. Being there forced me to analyze my beliefs and my hypocrisies. I had to think about things from different angles and truly battle with what I believed. The tension and the discomfort I felt were strong motivators to figure things out. I needed the extremism that is found there to be a counterpoint to me deciding for myself what resounds as Truth in my soul.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Now that I am away from BYU for the summer, I am surrounded by many people who are quite liberal and don’t care what I do either way. On one hand, it has been a much-needed escape to all of the pressure and tension of BYU. I really did need a break from all the intense soul searching I did there; the tension I felt at BYU was pretty profound. I have been away for almost two months now and have had the emotional rest and recuperation time I needed.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >On the other hand, I haven’t been advancing in my spirituality as quickly as I did while at BYU. I don’t feel any stress in the situation I am currently in, so there is no natural motivator to get me to think deeply. There are still things in my life that I need to resolve with religion, both as it relates to my sexuality and independently.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >So I am going back. I could use another round of deep introspection. I still have questions I need to answer before I can move on to the next stage of my life. I know it will probably somewhat painful again, but I am prepared for it this time.</span> <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" ><br /><br />Aside from the philosophical motivations in returning, I have social motivations also. I think that having a support group of other homosexuals is important for anyone with sexual identity questions. At BYU, there is a support group of people who are not only gay but are also Mormon and at the same stage of life that I am in. I think that is especially important. So I am also going back for that.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >There are several things I am apprehensive about (a post all on its own), but generally I am looking forward to returning. In fact, the more I think about it the more I miss it.</span> </div>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6817097599704129390.post-5260990436041579322008-06-19T11:23:00.004-06:002008-06-19T12:15:42.976-06:00Chicken or Egg?<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Did I ever mention that when I was a child I had to go to the speech pathologist for a while? What was my impediment? You guessed it. A lisp. Hmmmm, interesting.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >Yeah, Yeah. Correlation is not causation, or whatever. Admittedly, my lisp probably wasn't associated with with my gayness, but I'd still say it's at least worthy of note. And I am allowed to believe whatever I want.<br /><br />PS Some posts with actual substance coming soon.<br /></span>Tommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00748609445336219099noreply@blogger.com0